A rose by any other name would smell as sweet… unless it really stinks.

Normally I would have just posted this on Facebook. I would have made a quick note about celebrities and how they feel their children will be untouchable by the mean, ruthless, bullying and name calling that occurs on the playground. After all, they are famous. No one would dare mock their child for being named Audio Science. Or Pilot Inspektor. Or Diva Thin Muffin Pigeen (I’m sure your daughter’s not bitter, Frank Zappa). And now, dear Robert Downey Jr., with the normal name that everyone knows thanks to your many stints in rehab and your raw talent, you have deigned to bless your child with the name Exton. How kind of you! Now it’s not the worst name (I think Frank Zappa may have taken the cake on that front… Moon Unit? Dweezil? When will it stop!?) But, after hearing these ridiculous celebrity names, I’m just at a loss! And it doesn’t stop there.

I have had numerous conversations with normal, everyday people, who are naming their children crazy things (or more often, know someone who is guilty of the crime)! I understand wanting to be unique and not wanting your child to be one of 8 kids in their class with the same name. It gets confusing, I know. And adding a funky spelling to a classic name really doesn’t help. It still sounds the same and now it looks stupid. Obviously, I won’t be giving examples of “everyday-people-names”. I would offend someone more than I already have. But people, if you are preggers, know someone who is preggers, plan on getting preggers, please, PLEASE, for the sake of that child’s sanity, safety, and future professional life, don’t name them something cruel and ridiculous just because you want to be different. That kid will likely resent you for it. And change their name when they turn 18. I would. No one’s going to name me Moxie or Blueberry and get away with it.

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